Hjælp til oversættelse

Hej :) Er der nogen der har tid/lyst til at tjekke denne for stavefejl, rigtige bøjninger og grammatik :)?
Det ville bare være super!!!

Her der den danske tekst:
Kære Jane!
Jeg sidder og laver lektier, mens jeg lytter til noget fed musik i radioen. Min mor siger altid, at man ikke kan lave lektier og lytte til musik samtidig, men hun ved ikke hvad hun taler om.
I går havde jeg en fantastisk oplevelse. Som du ved, arbejder jeg hver eftermiddag i en bagerbutik, og igår kom en af mine venner, Sarah, ind i butikken, mens jeg var ved at betjene en ældre dame.
Damen blev meget vred, fordi jeg talte til Sarah, mens hun var ved at sige noget til mig. "Unge mennesker nu om dage ved ikke, hvordan man opfører sig" sagde damen vredt. Mens damen var ved at skælde os ud, kom bageren ind i butikken. Dette fik blot damen til at blive endnu mere vred, og mens jeg forsøgte at sige undskyld, råbte hun, at bageren var den mest uforskammede mand, hun nogensinde havde mødt, og at hun aldrig mere ville købe noget i hans butik. Hun var helt rød i hoved, og vi stod alle tre og spekulerede på, om hun ville eksplodere. Heldigvis styrtede hun ud af døren, før det kom så vidt, og det sidste vi så, var, at hun nærmest løb ned af gaden, mens hun forbandede bageren og unge mennesker. Efter den oplevelse kan du vel godt forstå, at jeg har brug for noget afslappende musik.

Og nu den engelske oversættelse:
Dear Jane!
I’m sitting, doing my homework, while I’m listening to some awesome music from the radio. My mom always says to me that, you cannot listen to music and make your homework at the same time, but she does not know what she is talking about. Yesterday I had a fantastic experience. As you know, I work every afternoon in a bakery, and yesterday one of my friends, Sarah came in the store, while I were serving an older lady. The lady got really angry, because I talked to Sarah, while she was about to tell something to me. “ Young people now at days, they don’t know how to behave,” said the lady angry. While the lady was yelling at us, the baker came into the store. He looked at the angry lady and asked her what was happened. This made the lady even angrier, and while I was trying to say I’m sorry to her, she yelled, to the baker that he was the rudest man she had ever met, and that she would never bye anything in his store again. She was completely red in her face, and we were all wondering about if she would explode. Luckily she ran out of the door, before it went so far, and the last we saw was, that she almost ran down the street, while she was cursing the baker and the young people. After that experience you might understand, that I need some relaxing music.
Love Liza.