Engelsk

Ikke fair karakter

25. januar 2023 af EHJSA - Niveau: 9. klasse

Hej! 

Jeg fik 7 for denne stil og jeg syntes at den lå til mere jeg ville lige vide hvad i syntes

 

I remember it vividly, the famous Martin Luther King Speech. You’ve probably heard all about it.
But do you know how it really felt to be there?


He gave the speech in front of the Lincoln Memorial in Washington D.C, and it made it even more powerful because it was Abraham Lincoln that gave freedom to the slaves in the great country of America. We were all there just listening to him giving his speech, it being so powerful and him talking about his idea of how America should be. He talked about him wanting
Freedom, Equality, and Justice for the black people of America. It still gives me goosebumps
thinking about it. It felt like the whole world was standing still just listening to Martin Luther King.

Him talking for all black people in America, those who couldn’t voice up with their opinions and those who had been treated like they weren’t human. 250.000 people were listening to this one man speak. In reality it was only him speaking but it felt like a million voices being heard. It didn’t take long for all of the voices to be heard. Martin Luther King gave his speech in ‘63 and the Civil Rights Act was signed in ‘65 which prohibited the discrimination of skin color, sex, or religion, everybody being free. It had been many years ago since America removed slavery but it never felt like the African American people were accepted. Now they were now they finally felt accepted and an American due to the Civil Rights Act. 

After the whole event I went and found Martin Luther King, and I was able to speak to him and it felt totally surreal. The way he spoke was just so convincing and good. Well spoken, good looking man he went in depth with the things he had said in the speech and I could listen to him talk for hours but sadly he was a busy man and I couldn’t take more of his time. Sadly he never got to see the new America he had formed. He was sadly shot in ‘68 and never got to experience the Civil Rights Act to Its fullest extent. 

Kravene var ''Skriv en tekst omkring en vigtigt begivenhed i et engelsk talene land og skriv det som du selv var der''


Brugbart svar (0)

Svar #1
25. januar 2023 af Heptan

#0

Hej! 

Jeg fik 7 for denne stil og jeg syntes at den lå til mere jeg ville lige vide hvad i syntes

 

I remember it vividly, the famous Martin Luther King Speech. You’ve probably heard all about it.
But do you know how it really felt to be there?


He gave the speech in front of the Lincoln Memorial in Washington D.C, and it made it even more powerful because it was Abraham Lincoln that gave freedom to the slaves in the great country of America. We were all there just listening to him giving his speech, it being so powerful and him talking about his idea of how America should be. He talked about him wanting
Freedom, Equality, and Justice for the black people of America. It still gives me goosebumps
thinking about it. It felt like the whole world was standing still just listening to Martin Luther King.

Him talking for all black people in America, those who couldn’t voice up with their opinions and those who had been treated like they weren’t human. 250.000 people were listening to this one man speak. In reality it was only him speaking but it felt like a million voices being heard. It didn’t take long for all of the voices to be heard. Martin Luther King gave his speech in ‘63 and the Civil Rights Act was signed in ‘65 which prohibited the discrimination of skin color, sex, or religion, everybody being free. It had been many years ago since America removed slavery but it never felt like the African American people were accepted. Now they were now they finally felt accepted and an American due to the Civil Rights Act. 

After the whole event I went and found Martin Luther King, and I was able to speak to him and it felt totally surreal. The way he spoke was just so convincing and good. Well spoken, good looking man he went in depth with the things he had said in the speech and I could listen to him talk for hours but sadly he was a busy man and I couldn’t take more of his time. Sadly he never got to see the new America he had formed. He was sadly shot in ‘68 and never got to experience the Civil Rights Act to Its fullest extent. 

Kravene var ''Skriv en tekst omkring en vigtigt begivenhed i et engelsk talene land og skriv det som du selv var der''

Du har desuden brugt talesprog (couldn't, you've, weren't) i stedet for formelt sprog (could not, you have, were not). 

Det er en fin stil du har skrevet. Jeg kender ikke kravene på 9. klasse, men karakterskalaen siger at 7 er en betegnelse for "Den gode præstation". "Karakteren 7 gives for den gode præstation, der demonstrerer opfyldelse af fagets mål, med en del mangler".

Hvorimod karakter 10 er "Den fortrinlige præstation". "Karakteren 10 gives for den fortrinlige præstation, der demonstrerer omfattende opfyldelse af fagets mål, med nogle mindre væsentlige mangler".

Hvis du vil klage, så må du vurdere om du har "en del mangler" eller "nogle mindre væsentlige mangler".


Brugbart svar (2)

Svar #2
26. januar 2023 af Stygotius

Som gammel gymnasielærer i engelsk må jeg sige at karakteren 7 er helt misforstået ud fra en helhedsbetragtning. Du har udvist en fortrinlig generel beherskelse af engelsk -med et rigtig godt ordforråd og en god formuleringsevne,  som ikke mange på dit klassetrin kan fremvise. De få og ubetydelige fejl der er, ødelægger på ingen måde det overordnede indtryk af dine evner til at formulere dig flydende på engelsk,          -navnlig ikke i betragtning af at du kun går i 9.klasse.

Jeg ville have givet 10 for besvarelsen. Den karakter vil svare til ministeriets definition med "mindre væsentlige mangler", hvilket er hvad der er tale om.

-Det er en misforståelse  at kalde former som isn't, hasn't, weren't  og lign. for "talesprog". Dem møder man  ofte i endog seriøse tekster, omend ikke i højtidelig stii.

I en besvarelse som din vil det være helt acceptabelt at anvende dem

I øvrigt skal man huske at en folkeskolelærer langt fra har de samme kompetencer som en  gymnasielærer


Svar #3
26. januar 2023 af EHJSA

Tak for det, snakker med hende omkring det i dag.

#2

Som gammel gymnasielærer i engelsk må jeg sige at karakteren 7 er helt misforstået ud fra en helhedsbetragtning. Du har udvist en fortrinlig generel beherskelse af engelsk -med et rigtig godt ordforråd og en god formuleringsevne,  som ikke mange på dit klassetrin kan fremvise. De få og ubetydelige fejl der er, ødelægger på ingen måde det overordnede indtryk af dine evner til at formulere dig flydende på engelsk,          -navnlig ikke i betragtning af at du kun går i 9.klasse.

Jeg ville have givet 10 for besvarelsen. Den karakter vil svare til ministeriets definition med "mindre væsentlige mangler", hvilket er hvad der er tale om.

-Det er en misforståelse  at kalde former som isn't, hasn't, weren't  og lign. for "talesprog". Dem møder man  ofte i endog seriøse tekster, omend ikke i højtidelig stii.

I en besvarelse som din vil det være helt acceptabelt at anvende dem

I øvrigt skal man huske at en folkeskolelærer langt fra har de samme kompetencer som en  gymnasielærer

Tak for det, snakker med hende omkring det i dag.


Brugbart svar (0)

Svar #4
26. januar 2023 af Stygotius

Selv tak.

Næ, du snakker måske med hende om det i dag.


Brugbart svar (0)

Svar #5
26. januar 2023 af Heptan

#4

Så du tror ikke de vil snakke forbi hinanden?

Anywho, bør man ikke i det mindste være konsistent med sammentrækninger, og sammentrække "he had" til "he'd"?


Brugbart svar (0)

Svar #6
30. januar 2023 af Stygotius

Nej, det behøver man ikke.


Brugbart svar (0)

Svar #7
24. februar 2023 af HansenDahl98

Der er dog et par mindre sproglige fejl og nogle sætningsstrukturer, der kunne forbedres for at gøre teksten mere flydende og nuanceret. Derudover kan det være en god idé at inkludere flere detaljer og beskrivelser af selve begivenheden og din oplevelse af den for at gøre teksten mere levende og engagerende for læseren. Men... ja ... Alt i alt vil jeg sige, at teksten er god, men der er plads til forbedringer.


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