Engelsk

Hjælp til formulering

15. juni 2022 af Annicca (Slettet) - Niveau: 9. klasse
Hej.
Jeg er i gang med eb aflevering i engelsk, hvor jeg i et afsnit skal skrive lidt om sociale medias baggrund.
Er der nogen, der hurtigt vil se på min korte tekst, og se om jeg eventuelt kan formulere mig bedre?
På forhånd tak.

Teksten er således:

One of the most appreciated innovations in the 21st century is the invention of social media. It started for real when the inventions of smartphones came about in 1992. As the growth of smartphone users increased, the number of social media users also increased. It all began with the social media “Six Degrees”, which was born in 1997, where you could set up a profile page and send messages within networks. Since then it has only grown. Today we have over 100 different social media and we’re almost 5 billion people that use them every single day. The most used social media are; Facebook, YouTube, WhatsApp, Instagram, and Tik Tok.


Brugbart svar (0)

Svar #1
15. juni 2022 af MN0710

Synes det lyder super fint. Det er egentlig bare små ting og måske også mere hvad man selv synes lyder bedre. Ville dog måske prøve at skrive "As the use of smartphones grew, so did social media and its users.".

Ift. det sociale media 'Six Degrees', ville jeg nok ikke bruge ordet 'born' men 'made', og jeg ville tilføje 'types of' efter 'different' ( "Today we have over 100 different social media"). "We're almost 5 billion people that use them" ville jeg skrive "There are almost 5 billion people who uses it". Ellers synes jeg det er rigtig fint skrevet!:)


Brugbart svar (1)

Svar #2
15. juni 2022 af Stygotius


One of the most appreciated (innovations) advances in the 21st century is the invention of social media. It (started for real) happened (when) with  the (inventions) advent of smartphones (came about) in 1992. As the (growth) number of smartphone users increased, so did the number of social media users (also increased). It all began with the social medi(a)um “Six Degrees”, which was born in 1997, (where) when you could set up a profile page and send messages (within) through networks. Since then it has only (grown) increased further. Today we have over 100 different social media and we’re almost 5 billion people on the planet that use them every single day. The most used social mediare; Facebook, YouTube, WhatsApp, Instagram, and Tik Tok.

Svar #1 - Citér
17 minutter siden af MN0710

Synes det lyder super fint. Det er egentlig bare små ting og måske også mere hvad man selv synes lyder bedre. Ville dog måske prøve at skrive "As the use of smartphones grew, so did social media and its users.".

(Ift.) I forb.med det sociale medi(a)um 'Six Degrees', ville jeg nok ikke bruge ordet 'born' men 'made', og jeg ville tilføje 'types of' efter 'different' ( "Today we have over 100 different social media"). "We're almost 5 billion people that use them" ville jeg skrive "There are almost 5 billion people who use(s) it". Ellers synes jeg det er rigtig fint skrevet!:)


Brugbart svar (0)

Svar #3
15. juni 2022 af MN0710

#2


One of the most appreciated (innovations) advances in the 21st century is the invention of social media. It (started for real) happened (when) with  the (inventions) advent of smartphones (came about) in 1992. As the (growth) number of smartphone users increased, so did the number of social media users (also increased). It all began with the social medi(a)um “Six Degrees”, which was born in 1997, (where) when you could set up a profile page and send messages (within) through networks. Since then it has only (grown) increased further. Today we have over 100 different social media and we’re almost 5 billion people on the planet that use them every single day. The most used social mediare; Facebook, YouTube, WhatsApp, Instagram, and Tik Tok.

Svar #1 - Citér
17 minutter siden af MN0710

Synes det lyder super fint. Det er egentlig bare små ting og måske også mere hvad man selv synes lyder bedre. Ville dog måske prøve at skrive "As the use of smartphones grew, so did social media and its users.".

(Ift.) I forb.med det sociale medi(a)um 'Six Degrees', ville jeg nok ikke bruge ordet 'born' men 'made', og jeg ville tilføje 'types of' efter 'different' ( "Today we have over 100 different social media"). "We're almost 5 billion people that use them" ville jeg skrive "There are almost 5 billion people who use(s) it". Ellers synes jeg det er rigtig fint skrevet!:)

Haha, tak for rettelsen.


Svar #4
15. juni 2022 af Annicca (Slettet)

Er det så såden her, det skal se ud:

One of the most appreciated advances in the 21st century is the invention of social media. It happened with the advent of smartphones in 1992. As the number of smartphone users increased, so did the number of social media users. It all began with the social medium “Six Degrees”, which was born in 1997, when you could set up a profile page and send messages through networks. Since then it has only increased further. Today we have over 100 different social media and we’re almost 5 billion people on the planet that use them every single day. The most used social media are; Facebook, YouTube, WhatsApp, Instagram, and Tik Tok.


Brugbart svar (0)

Svar #5
15. juni 2022 af kravlundis

Ville man ikke skrive "... of (i stedet for in) the 21st century..."?

Brugbart svar (1)

Svar #6
15. juni 2022 af Stygotius

Hmm, -begge dele vil være helt i orden men måske har du  ret  at "of" ville være en smule idiomatisk end "in" .


Brugbart svar (0)

Svar #7
15. juni 2022 af Stygotius

ad # 2

Jeg ville nok snarere sige "established"  end "born" eller "made"


Brugbart svar (1)

Svar #8
15. juni 2022 af Stygotius

En lille rettelse til #4

I stedet for "5 billion people on the planet that use them every single day." skriv "5 billion people on the planet, which use them every single day."  Læg mærke til kommaet efter ordet "planet". Der er tale om en parentetisk relativsætning.  


Brugbart svar (0)

Svar #9
15. juni 2022 af kravlundis

ad #4

Jeg synes, at det lyder bedre sådan her:

(I min udgave er social media ental, fordi jeg ser på selve fænomenet, og ikke konkrete sociale medier)

It all began with the social medium “Six Degrees”, which was born in 1997, where when you could set up a profile page and send messages through networks. Since then, social media has only evolved further has only increased further. Today we have over 100 different social media, with almost 5 billion people using and we’re almost 5 billion people on the planet that use them every single day. The most used social media today are; Facebook, YouTube, WhatsApp, Instagram, and Tik Tok.
 


Brugbart svar (0)

Svar #10
15. juni 2022 af Stygotius

Der er ingen forskel på begrebet og de konkrete medier

Det er fuldkommment ulogisk at bruge "where" om tid i stedet for "when"   -navnlig på  engelsk. På dansk og tysk måske  men ikke på engelsk.

Det er altd farligt at lade det som en individuel person synes "lyder bedre", være en rettesnor  -omend dine forslag er udmærkede


Svar #11
15. juni 2022 af Annicca (Slettet)

Nu har jeg altså gjort sådan her:

One of the most appreciated advances of the 21st century is the invention of social media. It happened with the advent of smartphones in 1992. As the number of smartphone users increased, so did the number of social media users. It all began with the social medium “Six Degrees”, which was made in 1997, when you could set up a profile page and send messages through networks. Since then, it has only evolved further. Today we have over 100 different social media and we are almost 5 billion people on the planet, who use them every single day. The most used social media today are; Facebook, YouTube, WhatsApp, Instagram, and Tik Tok.


Brugbart svar (0)

Svar #12
15. juni 2022 af kravlundis

ad #10

Nuvel, tillad mig at omformulere: 

"Jeg synes, at budskabet fremgår tydeligere, hvis du formulerer dig således:"

Det er fuldkommment ulogisk at bruge "where" om tid i stedet for "when"   -navnlig på  engelsk.

Okay - det var jeg ikke klar over. For mig lyder det, når man bruger "when", som om at man kun kunne oprette profiler og sende beskeder i 1997. 


Brugbart svar (0)

Svar #13
15. juni 2022 af Stygotius

#11

Godt, og så lurer katastrofen ikke lige om hjørnet.


Brugbart svar (0)

Svar #14
15. juni 2022 af Stygotius

ad #12

Ok -for at fjerne enhver tvivl kan du erstatte "could" med "became able  to".


Skriv et svar til: Hjælp til formulering

Du skal være logget ind, for at skrive et svar til dette spørgsmål. Klik her for at logge ind.
Har du ikke en bruger på Studieportalen.dk? Klik her for at oprette en bruger.