Hjælp til rettelse

Jeg har simpelthen set mig blind. Jeg ønsker ikke en direkte rettelse, men vil gerne have en forklaring på fejlen så jeg ikke blot får andre til at rette. Opgaven lød:
A. Write an open letter to the mayor of your city (a letter to be published in the local paper, e.g.) in which you argue convincingly in favour of banning fireworks completely in and around the city. Your letter must be approximately 500 words long.
Opgaven:

Dear Mayor of Nyborg and occupiers.
I write this in hope of you, the Mayor, will read it and because I’m worried. I live in the town centre. Every year seams my garden as if it was a warzone. The whole town centre is covered in smoke and small skips are in fire. Young people, kids, are running around among these fireplaces. And unfortunately does some of these kids and young people gets hurt by all the dangerous and sometime illegal fireworks. The town centre is like a warzone every year in the last part of December.
A week before (skal der et “the” foran her?) New Year’s Eve someone did set off some kind of bomb in the pedestrian street. The bomb ruined two windows in my flat. Not only in my flat but also in other flats in an area of approximately 100 m. They only payers are us, the victims.
(skal der the foran her?) New Year’s Eve is not only a party for me. It is also that time of the year where I have to save some extra money. Almost every year I have to bye new windows. The day after the New Year’s Eve is a working day. I wake up to a neighborhood in a totally disorder. Flowers, decorations, bottles and other things are spread all over the town and a lot of things are ruined. My garden around my flat is all filled with old and maybe still dangerous fireworks. As a good neighbor I try to clean up in our area and round our area.
I will try to reach out to those parents for who has (for hvem der har) there kids running around the town with fireworks. Are you not care of the problem? Do you don’t know that your kids are in danger? I don’t want to raise you and your kids, but they are in danger for them self and us around them. I hate to hear about kids who have seriously injuries and are suffering from the effects of the accident for the rest of their long life. Talk to your children!

Simply I hope that other can see the problem. My idea to make the town centre still standing after the New Year’s Eve is to simply forbid fireworks in and around the town. This way we also save the society for lots of money. Money which are better used for schools and new flowers in the park. (noget galt I denne sætning) We also have to talk to the children. The statistics talk for them self. We need to stand together and make this a better and a safer society.

Take you for your time.
Mrs. Larson.