engelsk stil- rettelse

hej, er der nogen venlige sjæle der ude some kan hjælpe mig med at rette denne stil :D

den skal afleveres fredag.

tak på forhånd :D

He past all those people without noticing them and their behavior. He only dreamed of the girl he had a crush on young Tiva from his childhood. They grew up together and went to the same school. They had known each other for almost 20 years. He lost contact to her since graduation until recently he found her by looking through several phonebooks and numbers. He called her and invited her out. They agreed to meet in a well-known and expensive restaurant downtown. He was on his move. Directing to the restaurant until, he met by coincidence his old school teacher.

“oh, hallo, Charlie. How funny to see you here. It has been ages since I saw you last. Where have you been?” Asked the teacher who was an middle-aged male with short, white beard. His voice was fresh, soft and very kind. He could always be recognized by way of speech and his long smile.

“Mr. Fornell. How funny to see you too. You haven’t changed that much in these last 10 years, huh? “ did Charlie reply fast and gently.

“no actually, I only feel that its like only few months ago I taught you the alphabet… hahaha, sorry, ehm. So? are these flowers made for a special person? Did the teacher ask of curiosity.

“yes! Actually they are for Tiva. You do remember her, right?”

“yes, I do. She was a beautiful girl back then. Nice flowers by the way. You know… you used to paint flowers at my art classes and they always turned out to be the most colorful paintings. But excuse me, I need to hurry up. I am late for a meeting in the Wold Trade Center. Well, good luck with Tiva, my friend. ”

“yea, bye sir.”

They left each other and continued their way. Charlie arrived to the restaurant where he saw Tiva waiting for him. He hid the flowers behind his back and walked right to her.

“Hi, Tiva!”

“Hello, Charlie.” did Tiva reply with an annoyed voice.

“what’s wrong?” Charlie asked.

“Lets take a walk in the park. I’m not hungry and we need to catch the neglected time.” she said fast and determined.

“alright then, come on.” he said while still hidden the flowers.

They walked to the nearest park and they were romantically alone at the same time strange that no one was there. Charlie thought this was the perfect time to ask her.

Tiva was talking constantly while they were walking, but Charlie did listen to a single sentence. Suddenly he jumped in front of her, showed her the flowers and asked her:” will you take these flowers that symbolize my love to you?

“What!?” did Tiva reply surprised.

“you heard me.” said Charlie while smiling widely.

“I just told you, I married Leon 2 years ago, didn‘t you listen?! Now she was talking with madness. Leon used to pick on Charlie and beat him up sometimes, because Charlie was in love with Tiva at that time and Leon didn’t like it. Leon made Charlie’s life hell.

“Im sorry, but…” Charlie was trying to finish, until she interrupted him

“you have always been the weird guy, and you still are! You know what? I going home now, and don’t contact me ever! I don’t like you! I never did! She said while she took the flowers from his hands and trough them on the ground, turned around and left. Charlie felt the sad, lonely and mad. The anger took over. he looked down saw the flowers on the ground, put his hands in his inside pocket and pulled his gun.

“TIVA!!” he yelled, and as she turned around he aimed and pulled the trigger. He hit her right at her heart. He couldn’t believe his own action. Committing homicide to the person he truly loved, but it was too late. The police would surely find him. His life has been hell, so he wanted to end this long nightmare. He took the gun and putted to his head while standing on Tiva’s body.

He pulled the trigger.