MIndre engelsk stil

Jeg ved godt der måske står en del, men er der ikke en der vil være rigtig flink bare at kigge den igennem for de væreste fejl, skal nemlig afleveres i morgen. Mv Jens

The tekst is adapted from an autobiography by Lis in 1999. The story must takes/ place somewhere / USA, as the writer is an American and it said/ that Marie’s mother has bought pastry in the Italian bakery in Hempstead . Most of the store pass/ off in the narrators Jewish home but some of it also by/ Maria’s Christian home.
The narrator is a girl which age I unknown/, a guess will be she is about 12 because it said that she is a child but it also said that she drinks alcohol “I was a little tipsy” . Her name is also unknown but since it is a/ autobiography it probably must be Lis. We kwon/ that she is a child who is very infatuates/ with Christmas and that she lives by her parents. Her problem about Christmas is that because she and her parents religious persuasion, Jewish, they don’t celebrate it and don’t do all the things that goes along with it. The only Christmas she really gets is by her best Marie Piscatelli who lives “three houses down and four around the corner” . Every Christmas eve she helps the Piscatelli with the delicate Christmas decorations. Even though the narrator is exquisitely clumsy around the decoration stuff, Marie’s mother likes her very much because of her politeness and because she was a good eater ( she eat all the different kind of food the mother makes).
She has a big dilemma because she doesn’t understand why her family cant celebrate Christmas just because there/ religion don’t allow them to celebrate anything else than Hanukkah. And that is why she come in a minor theological discussion with her mother how/ just answer her with “You’ll understand when you are older” . I think this phrase show us that the relationship between the narrator and her parent/ not is as good as it could be. I do not think it is sensible to solve a issue like that without trying to explain “why”. You can also see that it is not a golden relationship there/ are/ between them in the part of the story where the narrator gets ill. It said “She even offered to play Go fish with me” it sound very much as it is something she normally not will offer her.
The contrast to this not so good relationship must be, in my eyes, the very good relationship between the narrator and the Pascatelli. Just the greatness about letting the narrator in to/(into) their house and enjoy the Christmas with them talk for it self/(itself).
Why the author specific has choose/ the title “Magic” can have a lot of meanings. Overriding I think “Magic” is chose because it will be the word the narrator will connect with Christmas. In the story the narrator actually tell us that magic for her is food “Marie’s father had ulcers. No magic for him” . I think it is just something she say to hide what magic really a/ for her. Some other strange occurrences that the narrator experience is that she see her parents as ghosts which I think just is a weard/(weird) dream, the other thing is that a sled that have gave/ her genuine infatuation suddenly appears in her room. The thing about the sled could be magic because the narrator normally not/ gets/ expensive gifts.
The main theme in the story is religion. Not only the difference between different religions, in this case Christian and Jewish, but also how important it is to learn to live with each other even though we do not have the same religion. An other important theme in the story is family life. I think the story show us how important it is that every family members meaning have to be taken serious. For an ensample/ if the Jewish family have celebrate/ Christmas in some way they could have saved a lot of problems. And as the narrator herself say it “We celebrate people’s birthdays all the time. What’s so bad about this one” .


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Du glemmer mange gange 3 person singularis ved verberne. Jeg har afmærket et par eksempler i begyndelsen. Genitiv af ord på -s skal have ' efter sig. Nogle steder bruger du datid, hvor jeg ville bruge nutid, også her har jeg afmærket et par eksempler i begyndelsen. / har jeg sat ved ord der er brugt eller stavet forkert. I enkelte tilfælde også fordi et verbum er forkert bøjet - mest i perfektum af stærke verber. Håber det bringer dig lidt videre :-)

Ps: Husk osse an foran navneord der starter med vokal: an evening, ikke a evening

Har prøvet at rette dine rettelser. Håber det er blevet mere rigtigt nu.

The tekst is adapted from an autobiography by Lis in 1999. The story must takes place somewhere in the USA, as the writer is an American and it said that Marie’s mother has bought pastry in the Italian bakery in Hempstead . Most of the story goes off in the narrators Jewish home but some of it also in Maria’s Christian home.
The narrator is a girl which age is unknown, a guess will be she is about 12 because it said that she is a child but it also s that she drinks alcohol “I was a little tipsy” . Her name is also unknown but since it is an autobiography it probably must be Lis. We knew that she is a child who is very infatuates with Christmas and that she lives by her parents. Her problem about Christmas is that because she and her parents religious persuasion, Jewish, they don’t celebrate it and don’t do all the things that goes along with it. The only Christmas she really gets is by her best Marie Piscatelli who lives “three houses down and four around the corner” . Every Christmas eve she helps the Piscatelli with the delicate Christmas decorations. Even though the narrator is exquisitely clumsy around the decoration stuff, Marie’s mother likes her very much because of her politeness and because she was a good eater ( she eat all the different kind of food the mother makes).
She has a big dilemma because she doesn’t understand why her family cant celebrate Christmas just because their religion don’t allow them to celebrate anything else than Hanukkah. And that is why she come in a minor theological discussion with her mother who just answer her with “You’ll understand when you are older” . I think this phrase show us that the relationship between the narrator and her parents not is as good as it could be. I do not think it is sensible to solve a issue like that without trying to explain “why”. You can also see that it is not a golden relationship there are between them in the part of the story where the narrator gets ill. It said “She even offered to play Go fish with me” it sound very much as it is something she normally not will offer her.
The contrast to this not so good relationship must be, in my eyes, the very good relationship between the narrator and the Pascatelli. Just the greatness about letting the narrator into their house and enjoy the Christmas with them talk for itself.
Why the author specific has chose the title “Magic” can have a lot of meanings. Overriding I think “Magic” is chose because it will be the word the narrator will connect with Christmas. In the story the narrator actually tell us that magic for her is food “Marie’s father had ulcers. No magic for him” . I think it is just something she say to hide what magic really is for her. Some other strange occurrences that the narrator experience is that she see her parents as ghosts which I think just is a weird dream, the other thing is that a sled that have give her genuine infatuation suddenly appears in her room. The thing about the sled could be magic because the narrator normally doesn’t gets expensive gifts.
The main theme in the story is religion. Not only the difference between different religions, in this case Christian and Jewish, but also how important it is to learn to live with each other even though we do not have the same religion. An other important theme in the story is family life. I think the story show us how important it is that every family members meaning have to be taken serious. For an example if the Jewish family have celebrated Christmas in some way they could have saved a lot of problems. And as the narrator herself say it “We celebrate people’s birthdays all the time. What’s so bad about this one” .

Er der ikke en der vil være rigtig flink til at tage sig tid til at se om mine rettelser er korrekte. På forhånd mange tak.

Nu har jeg ikke lige kigger hele din stil igennem, men allerede de første to linjer:
The tekst is adapted from an autobiography by Lis in 1999. The story must takes place somewhere in the USA, as the writer is an American and it said that Marie’s mother has bought pastry in the Italian bakery in Hempstead

*It's called, a text, not a tekst
*Because u use, the modalverb "must", u have to write the following verb in the form om infinitive!
*I think u miss a "is" between "it" and "said" -- remmember to keep the presens tense, because u started ur story in this tense. Anyway.. it would be even better, if u wrote: ... and it sayS that Marie's moter has ....

Of course I meant *the form of infinitive, and *u miss an "is" ...
Jeg skal seriøst begynde at læse mine posts igennem, før jeg sender dem afsted.. self. mener jeg også *har jeg ikke lige kigget hele din....
Pardon

Jeg forstod det til at det nogenlunde blev sådan her:


The text is adapted from an autobiography by Lis in 1999. The story must take place somewhere in the USA, as the writer is an American and it is says that Marie’s mother has bought pastry in the Italian bakery in Hempstead . Most of the story goes off in the narrators Jewish home but some of it also in Maria’s Christian home.
The narrator is a girl which age is unknown, a guess will be she is about 12 because it says that she is a child but it also says that she drinks alcohol “I was a little tipsy” . Her name is also unknown but since it is an autobiography it probably must be Lis. We knew that she is a child who is very infatuates with Christmas and that she lives by her parents. Her problem about Christmas is that because she and her parents religious persuasion, Jewish, they don’t celebrate it and don’t do all the things that goes along with it. The only Christmas she really gets is by her best Marie Piscatelli who lives “three houses down and four around the corner” . Every Christmas eve she helps the Piscatelli with the delicate Christmas decorations. Even though the narrator is exquisitely clumsy around the decoration stuff, Marie’s mother likes her very much because of her politeness and because she was a good eater ( she eat all the different kind of food the mother makes).
She has a big dilemma because she doesn’t understand why her family cant celebrate Christmas just because their religion don’t allow them to celebrate anything else than Hanukkah. And that is why she come in a minor theological discussion with her mother who just answer her with “You’ll understand when you are older” . I think this phrase show us that the relationship between the narrator and her parents not is as good as it could be. I do not think it is sensible to solve a issue like that without trying to explain “why”. You can also see that it is not a golden relationship there are between them in the part of the story where the narrator gets ill. It says “She even offered to play Go fish with me” it sound very much as it is something she normally not will offer her.
The contrast to this not so good relationship must be, in my eyes, the very good relationship between the narrator and the Pascatelli. Just the greatness about letting the narrator into their house and enjoy the Christmas with them talk for itself.
Why the author specific has chose the title “Magic” can have a lot of meanings. Overriding I think “Magic” is chose because it will be the word the narrator will connect with Christmas. In the story the narrator actually tell us that magic for her is food “Marie’s father had ulcers. No magic for him” . I think it is just something she say to hide what magic really is for her. Some other strange occurrences that the narrator experience is that she see her parents as ghosts which I think just is a weird dream, the other thing is that a sled that have give her genuine infatuation suddenly appears in her room. The thing about the sled could be magic because the narrator normally doesn’t gets expensive gifts.
The main theme in the story is religion. Not only the difference between different religions, in this case Christian and Jewish, but also how important it is to learn to live with each other even though we do not have the same religion. An other important theme in the story is family life. I think the story show us how important it is that every family members meaning have to be taken serious. For an example if the Jewish family have celebrated Christmas in some way they could have saved a lot of problems. And as the narrator herself say it “We celebrate people’s birthdays all the time. What’s so bad about this one” .