Hurtig blik på fejl i grammatikken

Hej alle sammen!
Jeg ville være rigtig glad hvis der var nogle der gad bruge 5 minutter på at kigge nedestående igennem bare for de væreste grammatiske fejl, da jeg ikke er den bedste til Engelsk.. På forhånd mange tak:)

The text is about a study of schoolchildren’s food choices in England making by the children’s charity Barnardo.
The examination shows that the majority of children choose unhealthy food over healthy options, because they are afraid of the threat of bullying. Their choice of food categorises them in the eyes of their peers in the same way as their clothes, music or interests. Them who eat the healthy food regards as a posh sporty girl, who is the teacher’s pet, whereas them who prefers fast food consider as the smart one, who is greedy and naughty.
There is an example in the text, how roughs the children can be when a pupil eats something different, than the majority. A Chinese boy brought home-cooked chicken legs for lunch, and he was driven to tears, because fellow pupils dubbed him “chicken boy”.
It is a big problem, the Barnardo suggest moving the machines that selling sugary or fatty foods from schools and that the schools watchdog instead should inspect school meals provision

I definitely think it is a wrong attitude. As we found out, there are many children who are being bullied at school over healthy food choices, and therefore have to choose the unhealthy food to being accepted. Maybe they actually like to eat healthy food, but they can not because they are afraid.
And what about the immigrant kids, which parents give them unhealthy food to do anything to give them all the advantages of being American? It is clear that they just eat the food their parents give them, all kids would normally.