Engelsk

Engelsk stil

18. december 2017 af BlueRoses - Niveau: 9. klasse

Hej, Jeg vil rigtig gerne blive bedre til at skrive stile på engelsk, og derfor har jeg skrevet en kort stil, som I meget gerne må rette og prøve at komme med en karakter

Hi Lena,

I'm so excited to see you, your parents and little Adrienne. I am already planning on, what we are going to experience together. I have decided, that we are going to Legoland. Legoland is an amazing place for having fun, and it's about 100 km away from where I live. I have never been to Legoland, and I know that you haven't either, so that was the perfect place I could fine. We are travelling on Sunday the 24th December. Your family must be at the train station at 10 am. After we have taking the train, we are going for a walk in about 30 minutes before we arrive to Legoland. When we arrive, the first think we have to do is to go through the ticket machine and get our tickets. After that, we can look forward to have fun. The first thing we should try is the Legoldmine. What I have heard from my friends is, that it is the funniest place in Legoland. After we have tried that, I think it is time for dinner. I have decided, that we should go and eat at a restaurant called Knights restaurant. What my friends have experienced is, that their food is amazing. After dinner, we are having some free time, where we can do whatever we want in Legoland. I chose Legoland, because I know that you and your family are going throught a lot of things. Therefore I think that you and your family need a break from your daily life, and come out and experience new things. I'm still in shock after you told me that Adrienne has cancer. I could believe it and I began to cry, because I know how much Adrienne means to you and your family. And I know that this trip would mean a lot to Adrienne, because I think this is what she needed. I'm hoping, that your family is excited as much as I am, and we would see each other very soon.

From,

Nina


Svar #1
18. december 2017 af BlueRoses

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Svar #2
21. december 2017 af idaaayy

Hi Lena,

I'm so excited to see you, your parents and little Adrienne. I am already planning on what we are going to experience together. I have decided, that we're going to Legoland. Legoland is an amazing place for having fun, and it's about 100 km away from where I live. I have never been to Legoland, and I know that you haven't either, so that was the perfect place I could fine. We are travelling on Sunday the 24th December. Your family must be at the train station at 10 am. After we have taking the train, we are going for a walk in about 30 minutes before we arrive to Legoland. When we arrive, the first thing we have to do is to go through the ticket machine and get our tickets. After that, we can have fun. The first thing, we should try is the Legoldmine. From what I've heard from my friends, it's the funniest place in Legoland. After we have tried that, I think it's time for dinner. I have decided, that we will go and eat at a restaurant called "Knight's Restaurant". What my friends have experienced is, that their food is amazing. After dinner, we are having some free time, where we can do whatever we want in Legoland. I chose Legoland, because I know you and your family are going throught a lot. Therefore I think that you and your family need a break from your daily life and should come out and experience new things. I'm still in shock after you told me, that Adrienne has cancer. I could believe it and I began to cry, because I know how much Adrienne means to you and your family. And I know that this trip would mean a lot to Adrienne, because I think this is what she needs. I'm hoping, that your family is excited as much as I am, and we would see each other very soon.

From,

Nina

det er en fin tekst, du har skrevet, med små fejl. dog er der forkert brug af tid, og ordstillingerne passer ikke altid helt ind, så sætningerne giver mest mening — hvilket er derfor, jeg har valgt at give dig mellem 7 og 10. 


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Svar #3
21. december 2017 af Stygotius

(I'm so excited) I simply cannot  wait to (see) meet you, your parents and little Adrienne. I am already planning (on) what we are all going to experience together. I have decided(, that we're going) that we go to Legoland(. Legoland), which is an amazing place for having fun(, and it). It's about 100 km (away) from where I live. I have never been to Legoland, and I know that you haven't either, so that was the (perfect) most excting place I could (fine) find. We (are travelling) shall beleaving on Sunday (the) 24(th) December. Your family must be at the train/railway station at 10 am. (After we have taking the train, we are going) When we reach our destination we (go for a walk) shall have to walk (in) about 30 minutes (before we arrive) to get to Legoland. When we arrive, the first thing we have to do is (to) go through the ticket machine and get our tickets. After that(,) we can (have) begin having fun. The first thing(, we should) to try is the Legoldmine. From what I've heard from my friends(,) it's the funniest place in Legoland. (After we have tried that, I think it's) Then it will be time for dinner. I have (decided, that we will go and) madeplæans for us to eat at a restaurant called "Knight's Restaurant". (What my friends have experienced is, that their food is) My friends have found their food amazing. After dinner, we (are having, where we) have some free time on our hands and can do whatever we want in Legoland. I chose Legoland, because I know that you and your family are going throught a lot(. Therefore I think) and so I thought that you and your family could need a break from your daily (life) routine and (should come) get out and experience (new things) something new. I'm still in shock after you told me, that Adrienne has cancer. I could believe it and I began to cry(,) because I know how much (Adrienne) she means to you and your family. (And) I know that this trip would mean a lot to (Adrienne,) her. (because) I think this is what she needs. I('m hoping,) hope that your family (is) are excited as much as I am(,) and that we (would see each other) willl meet again very soon.


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